Tea Party of the Damned
Fuck It I'm A Flower
Fuck It I'm A Flower
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Meet the pirouetting petal-princess 'possum you never knew you desperately needed. This couture-clad opossum has transcended both gravity and good sense, blossoming into a monochrome fever-dream of lace, stripes, and unapologetic attitude.
Perched en pointe atop her orb like some unholy ballerina-botanica, she twirls in a flurry of checkerboard petals that say, “Yes, I bloomed at midnight, and yes, I bite.” Perfect for lovers of dark whimsy, oddities, surreal glamour, and anything that looks like Tim Burton crashed a tea party hosted by the underworld.
Whether she’s the statement piece of your cabinet of curiosities or the absurd little joy-bomb your guests can’t stop asking about, this floral feral queen delivers.
✨ Details:
— Species: Delightfully dramatic opossum
— Aesthetic: Circus-goth garden party with a dash of chaos
— Side effects: Uncontrolled giggling, guests questioning your life choices, sudden desire to host a macabre tea party
Bring home the bloom that refuses to behave.
Because sometimes the petals choose violence. 🌸💀✨
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Shipping
Priority Shipping within continental U.S. is always free. Contact us directly to inquire about availability and rates to ship outside the U.S.
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Returns
Contact us if you receive a damaged product. Send pictures and a description of the damage. If it's repairable, we will email you a shipping label to send it back. If it's not, we'll issue a refund.